Finding a Spiritual Running Mate
If my memory serves me correctly, it was a short chapter in Romance of the Three Kingdoms — a classic Chinese historical novel, when a poet and a warrior crossed paths at a random rest stop one snowy night. They had a passionate heart-to-heart exchange over a bottle of wine on their mutual desire to serve their country and save its people. Their encounter was brief but they expressed to each other that their life was deemed worthy having met one other person who truly understood their deepest desire and purpose. They drank blood and swore under the moon, pointed to heaven as their witness and formed a brotherly bond.
I read that story probably when I was 12. Yet, long after I’d forgotten the names of those two historic figures, the sentiment stuck with me deeply and made me wonder if I will ever meet someone who gets me in that way.
While that was more a story of passion and loyalty in the context of patriotism in 14th century China, the longing of our deepest callings being validated remains the same. To me, finding another who truly understands the very essence of our being is what indeed makes life worthy. And having someone who supports our deepest callings helps our soul evolve.
Such a relationship doesn’t have to be romantic in nature. But, if you are lucky enough to find that in a sustainable romantic partnership then you could possibly have the most euphoric of unions.
Understanding the evolution of a soul isn’t the same as understanding why we are compelled to do what we do. It is the understanding that we are each here on earth, in this life, as a human being, given an opportunity to take a big step forward in the long, eternal journey of the soul. In other words, we are here to accomplish something (or quite possibly, many things) so our soul can move on to the next cycle.
Multi-purpose life
I don’t believe there is only one singular purpose for each person. I also don’t believe life purpose is something you necessarily stumble upon or are born into. That may be true for some, but for others, life purpose is something they cultivate and learn to enjoy. It’s just as meaningful to adopt a learned skill you can be proud of and apply purpose to it.
A soul’s purpose in a lifetime is simply what you find fulfilling. If your soul’s desire in this particular life is to make money and enjoy financial security then it will serve you as an important step in your journey towards your next phase of evolution upon completion.
And if your soul is ambitious, and you live long enough in a lifetime, you could very well be on a quest to accomplish many marvelous things.
Barenaked souls
This is scary as hell. To bare our soul to another makes us transparent and vulnerable. We forget the purity of our soul because we mistakenly think the ridicules we’d heard about our body and our thoughts apply to our soul.
We’ve grown to believe there are more people who would obstruct our soul’s journey than support it. We are not wrong, sadly.
To find a true spiritual running mate will require you to bare it all, eventually. How else will you know the depth of your connection and its authenticity if you hold back? There might be disappointments. There might be heartache. Is it worth the risk? Well, only you can answer that for yourself.
Being a spiritual running mate
If you have a strong desire for deep intimacy, then finding someone who will run alongside you on your spiritual journey is probably high up on your priority list. Having a spiritual running mate, however, means you will have to fulfill the very same role in return.
This role is first and foremost to provide a space of safety and compassion, allowing your running mate to freely express as well as pursue what is necessary to fulfill their needs. That doesn’t mean it’s done without boundaries. In fact, mutual love and respect in this relationship is of the utmost importance.
There will be portions of our spiritual journey that are ultimately alone, as no two souls, much like our DNA, are exactly alike. But having a spiritual running mate can carry you through those portions of the journey knowing they will be supported and understood.
At times, your mate’s journey will not make sense to you. You may even find it utterly ridiculous. So it’s important to understand that each soul is on its own path, at its own pace, taking steps towards its elusive destiny.
That deepest part of us, where our soul resides, and what I call the essence of our being, is what I believe to be the purest, most significant part of us. It wants to make its mark, be witnessed of its presence, and ultimately leave a legacy here on earth, before saying goodbye forever.
